Phorest FM Episode 195: Stefanie Fox On Leadership & What Staff Want From Their Salon
When running a business, the need to drive both performance and business often comes with thinking that dangling a carrot or motivating somebody to do something is the way weโre going to get there fastest. Yet when you look at human psychology, and you understand what makes people feel both interested and capable of doing something different, it requires that they work hand-in-hand with someone thatโs going to help them.
In this episode, we look at the differences between leadership & motivation, dive into Stefanie Foxโs recent research on staffโs wants and needs, and discuss what responsibilities a great leader has in todayโs industry & workforce changing landscape.
Guests
Stefanie Fox
Stefanie Fox is a motivational speaker and generational leadership expert who has spent 15 years building teams and educating leaders on the changes in todayโs workforce. She believes that the idea that the โleader has all of the answersโ is old thinking and that speaking directly to beauty industry talent is the only way to move forward and build teams that thrive.
Founder of Talent Match, a recruitment and team building agency that specializes in the beauty industry workforce, her work is rooted in research, where she surveys todayโs talent to understand what they want and then acts as the liaison between salon owners and salon talent to discuss and navigate hard conversations. Stefanie is also the founder of Canvas Salon and Skin Bar, a 5-times recipient of the Top 200 Salons in America award for its work culture and customer satisfaction. She sold the business in 2020 to focus exclusively on her research, educational offerings, and the Talent Match technology platform.
She lives in Columbus, Ohio and is a board member for the National Association of Women Business Owners, where she leads a committee that facilitates mastermind experiences. She also gives her time as a mentor with the Young Entrepreneurs Academy helping kids 18 and younger start businesses.
Transcript
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Last week, we continued the thought-starter conversation on Instagram Live, and we got some fantastic engagement. If you arenโt able to tune in live, or you just havenโt had the chance to catch up on it, you definitely should. You head over to @phorestsalonsoftware on Instagram, in the IGTV section of our profile, and you can catch all the past Lives weโve done around these thought-starter conversations. Like we said, our aim is to keep these going, and weโd love for you to request to join the Live. Weโll have you share your thoughts, your stories on the thought-starter question. Again, this week, towards the end of the episode, weโll draw another card.
Killian Vigna: Yeah. We actually had one salon asking us through the Live, how she could improve communication with her team. I think she was struggling to grasp if she was getting honest feedback from her team while they were closed. Understandably, when youโre not in the salon, you donโt have that face-to-face engagement itโs hard to kind of take what people say. Itโs like when you send someone a WhatsApp or an email, how I send it is perceived completely different or could be perceived completely different. Myself and Zoรฉ did giveโฆ We attempted to give feedback from a non-management point of view, but I actually think this is the perfect episode to provide that answer.
The "aha" moment [01:45]
Stefanie Fox: When I did a deeper dive into the research, like, what do you mean by friends? Because a significant portion of them said, they want their leader to be their friend and give them feedback. Itโs really about relationship. If you go back to what I said about an oath, we take this oath to show people the gap. Thatโs where the feedback has to come in, but youโre never going to have any of that received well if you donโt have a preexisting relationship with somebody, because then they donโt think you care. As leaders, we have to seek that level of relationship, where we do all the things we would do to build a great relationship with anyone else in a professional sphere, of course, so that we can follow through with our oath of helping them grow.
Connection is the basis for emotional stability and safety. Again, if weโre going to be somebody helping somebody else grow, and we know that means thereโs going to be difficult conversations at times, we have to have emotional safety. Connection is what allows us to be hopeful.
Introducing Stefanie Fox [02:42]
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: On the show with us today, a motivational speaker and generational leadership expert who has spent 15 years building teams and educating leaders on the changes in todayโs workforce. Stefanie Fox is the founder of Talent Match, a board member for The National Association of Women Business Owners, and more recently joined Phorest at its Uplift! virtual event for an inspiring and timely talk titled, Being a Great Leader, which people thought very highly of.
Killian Vigna: Stef, welcome back to Phorest FM! Itโs always a pleasure to speak with you. I think this is your second episode and weโre catching you pretty much fresh off the press from our recent Uplift! event. Welcome!
Stefanie Fox: Thank you! Iโm excited to be here again.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: So good to have you.
Killian Vigna: Yeah. No, absolutely. Yeah.
The difference between leadership & motivation [03:25]
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Stef, youโve always been keen on research, and for people who donโt know this, now you know, obviously, but like we said in the episodeโs intro, youโve spent 15 years building teams, educating leaders on the changes in todayโs workforce. At the minute, you believe weโre in an age of leading, not motivating, which I think a lot of people kind of go back to a lot โ motivation, right? What makes you believe that? And can you explain the differences you see in both?
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, in the place the world is in today, which the best word I use for all of it is just heavy. Not that it always feels heavy, but really this last year has had so many periods of heaviness. I think the natural thought when you are running a business is coming from a place of desperation to drive performance and drive business. We think that dangling a carrot or motivating somebody to do something is the way weโre going to get there fastest, but when you actually look at human psychology, and you understand what makes people feel both interested and capable of doing something different, it requires that they are hand in hand with someone thatโs gonna help them.
Thatโs leading. Motivating is this incentive, itโs a reward, itโs an end game, but leading is like, someone is holding your hand, theyโre walking you through, theyโre showing you how. When you go back to that heavy place that weโre kind of all living in, weโre ebb and flowing through, we need people right now. We need to feel like somebody is holding our hand and helping us. Thereโs so many questions in the salon space. Are our clients going to come back? Are new clients going to come in? Would they rather come to a big business with a bunch of stylists or would they rather go to a small space with a suite?
Thereโs so many unknowns right now that we need that leader around us that is hand in hand with us, connecting on that emotional level, and not just trying to incentivize performance through some kind of dangling carrot, because it doesnโt last. It doesnโt make you feel good, especially if you fail. If you donโt hit the goal and donโt win whatever the reward was, you just feel not great.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Yeah.
Killian Vigna: Yeah. I feel like motivation is kind of like a quick win, like, โOh, Iโve got to motivate myself to get out of bed on a Monday,โ or โIโve got to motivate myself to do this work.โ Itโs not sustainable. It doesnโt seem like itโs long-lasting. Then I feel like you have a harder crash then if you fail at it?
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Yeah. Iโve also actually heard quite often like motivation doesnโt get you to where you want to be. Some days you wonโt be motivated at all, like some days itโs going to be harder to just get out of bed. You need to be dedicated to that goal instead of just motivated. You will get some spurs of motivation obviously, but it wonโt always be that easy.
Killian Vigna: I think it was Shane Parrish, someone that weโve regularly referenced on this show. He was relating it to almost like a dopamine hit. Motivation is like trying to find your next dopamine hit, where youโre just constantly like, I need that next win, I need that next win. Sometimes, you feel like youโre chasing something thatโs not there or thatโs never going to come to fruition. It can actually be kind of dangerous in the end, yeah.
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, as you said, you feel so much worse if whatever was motivating you doesnโt get you to the actual goal you had in your mind. Itโs just like, ugh, and then you just feel defeated. Again, Iโm like, weโre in such a heavy place anyway mentally with whatโs going on with a global pandemic and, in the US, political unrest, and this all uncertainty. Itโs like, wow, we need to feel like thereโs some essence of hope in front of us. If someoneโs there with us on this journey, we can do this.
Killian Vigna: How do you then define leadership? You mentioned there a few times, we need someone to almost reach out and take us by the hand. Is it like a parent coming along and guiding a child? What does that actually entail?
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, I think of it more like friend to friend. Weโre not reallyโฆ Years ago, we debunked that hierarchy system of leadership, where it was like, it doesnโt work for there to be a person at the top thatโs like in charge. It does work from the perspective that they need to guide direction, but they need to be collaborative in that. I think that youโve got to be like friend and friend. Then for me, leadership is this idea that you take this oath that youโre going to help somebody get to their next best place.
That means you have to care about them, you have to care about the next best place theyโre going to, and you also probably have to have knowledge of how theyโre going to get there. Then the most critical element and where the hand-in-hand comes into play is you see what theyโre doing and you know what could be done differently to get to the next place, and you have to have the conversation. We shy away from that conversation because it feels like weโre going to hurt somebodyโs feelings, or weโre going to feel personally uncomfortable.
Then youโve just failed your oath. Youโre the person they trust to help them get to the next level, and youโre afraid of it.
Killian Vigna: So, itโs not necessarily like letting the child put their hand on the hob and burn themselves to then learn.
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, itโs definitely not through necessarily injuring yourself! I sometimes feel like, with my toddler, itโs likeโฆ Iโm like, โWell if you spill the milk with no lid on it, youโre going to learn. It spills.โ Itโs not always like that. But at the same time, thatโs a greatโฆ You could watch them fail, so to speak, and then go back and revisit the gap. Like, โhereโs what I saw you do,โ or โhereโs what I heard you say, letโs try this,โ and thatโs a great teaching moment.
What staff want from their salon, survey results [08:50]
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: In the past year or so, youโve been working on Talent Match quite a bit. As part of that work, you surveyed approximately, what was it? 20,000 stylists?
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, 20,000.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Was it in the US specifically?
Stefanie Fox: It was, yeah. It was a mix of stylists and students.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: On what they were looking for in their careers really. I think you have some pretty surprising findings to share with us today. What kind of struck you as odd, or surprising, or just really relevant to 2021?
Stefanie Fox: Yeah. Well, I mean, first, we talkโฆ My research for the last four years has shown that salon owners think their number one problem is finding staff. Then number two, which used to be number one, is keeping them. I just wanted to go straight to the source, and say like, what do you want? I was just like, Iโm going to ask the workforce, instead of a bunch of salon owners trying to brainstorm, like what we think is going to attract and retain talent. Letโs just ask them, โWhat do you want from us? Whatโs it going to take to get you in our business and to keep you in our business?โ
I think a few data points that just quite honestly blew my mind. Thereโs a perception in the salon community that we are losing to rental, that if you have an employee-based salon, rental is your biggest competitor. I even as a salon owner would say, I felt at times that that is a truth, but this data debunked that a bit. First of all, 69% of the respondents said they want to go to an employee-based business after they graduate, or in that first part of their career.
Some salon owners might think, well, โDuh, they want me to build their clientele, they want education.โ Maybe thatโs a no brainer. The second part was 71% of the 69% said, โBut I want to rent eventually.โ Thatโs like all of our worst nightmares. I mean, thatโs what keeps us up at night. Weโre going to build you, youโre going to be finally making money and not costing us money, and then youโre going to leave us.
Killian Vigna: And take your book.
Stefanie Fox: Take your whole book of business, right? Dreadful, so stressful. What was amazing though, so those numbers kind of logically make sense, whatโs amazing is that 89% of the 71% who said they wanted to leave eventually actually said they would stay if the salon could meet all of their needs, and that is a significant portion of our workforce. Thatโs like, โHey, if you would give me what I think I need and want, I wouldnโt go anywhere.โ Iโm like, wow. What do you want?
Killian Vigna: Money, I reckon, yeah?
Stefanie Fox: Whatโs interesting then, okay, so that question dialed down into, what are the top things that you need and want? The first, like the number one thing, was flexibility. Number two was autonomy or a sense of autonomy, and number three was money. Money only actually made up 23% of that pool. Thatโs amazing. We can [crosstalk 00:12:01].
Killian Vigna: It is, yeah, because instantly you always think of a higher salary, more money commission. Yeah, yeah. That was-
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, itโs not the driver.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: I wonder if COVID had a huge impact on the flexibility and autonomy part of that.
Stefanie Fox: Well, you know what? I think, one of the benefits of COVID, if there is one, is that salon owners were forced into flexibility and thatโs been a real place of resistance for a lot of salon owners. They think stylists have to work these certain number of days or hours a week, or you can never not work Saturdays, or you wonโt be successful, or you need three evenings a week. Like thereโs this kind of mentality in the beauty space around whatโs required to become successful, and so weโre kind of forcedโฆ Like when now we have less occupancy weโre allowed, hours are restricted.
If we can do that for COVID, we can come up with a long-term solution for flexibility. If we can solve that being their top need, awesome. Thatโs one step into keeping that 89%.
Survey demographics explained [13:00]
Killian Vigna: Yeah. Stef, Iโm really interested in digging a little deeper into this. You surveyed 20,000 people. The last time we had you on the show, we discussed Millennials and enticing them into the workplace. Were these the same sort of demographics that you were interviewing, or sorry, surveying, or were there a lot older? Was it like, yeah, the more Millennial generation that you were surveying to get these results?
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, itโs actually a mix. It was not just Millennials, but it was a big chunk of Millennials because thatโs a large portion of the workforce. This survey was made up of 47% Gen Z, 33% Millennial, 15% Gen X, and 5% Boomers.
Killian Vigna: Thatโs actually really impressive to say that thatโs just everyone in general. Itโs not this whole Millennial or Gen Z thing that wants more work-life balance. Itโs actually everyone now. Thatโs just the general workforce. How do we make that happen?
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, exactly. I mean, itโs like, we have to stop being frustrated by it and seeing it as a thing that we canโt do and just decide weโre going to find a solution. I just think as the world moves forward and as people get more used to things being different.
Itโs just like Uber, right? We would never get in a car with a stranger, and now we do, and it doesnโt matter what age you are. You accept that thatโs a thing. The worldโs just so open and so transparent, and things move so fast that we cannot apply that logic to our workforce.
Theyโre consumers, theyโre out there consuming all different ways on-demand, instantaneous, and we have to be thinking about like, what does that mean for our industry? Why does our workforce then show up how they do? We really canโt be surprised.
What teams want from their salon [14:48]
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Yeah. If autonomy, flexibility, and money, and I know I didnโt put them in the right order there, but if those were the top three needs for individuals, was there anything different in terms of what a collective group, say a salon team, would need? Because Iโd imagine that would differ a little bit more. Maybe you want more education, maybe you want moreโฆ Like certain different things.
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, across the board, the reason why people said they picked salons, the number one reason was the team, and I thought, that was fascinating becauseโฆ First, they say they want a team that feels like a family, like โ top priority. Then the number one reason they actually pick the location they work in is for the team. But weโre in this interesting time where itโs really hard to understand anything about a team before you actually join the business. When you interview at a salon, I mean, if you shadow, you might have an hour for you to be around the team.
My thinking is they must be going off of like a gut check, right? In that hour, did I feel like the team was the type of people I want to be around, but thereโs nothing actually tangible there that helps them determine that thatโs a good fit. But other things that they said that they really cared about were, of course, education, and access to education. Thereโs a whole variety of what they want there. Old school thinking would have been itโs this one or two-year program.
Now, it comes all the way down to some people say, like, โI donโt want to go through a formal program. I want to take the education on the things that I say I want to learn, and thatโs it.โ Then, of course, thereโs still a lot of people who want a formal program, whether itโs six months. Most people wanted three months or less for education that was formal.
Then the way they want education. Do they want it one-on-one? Do they want to in-person or online? Virtual was actually one of the lowest selections for education. I think it would be interesting to revisit in my 2021 survey, like how has that shifted because of COVID? Now that virtual has become a reality, no matter what you do with your life like youโre on Zoom.
Leadership was another key piece. The number one reason they pick you is your team. The number one reason they leave you is the leader. Thatโs interesting. I think it just speaks to like, they form this bond with the team, but they think of them as friends, and theyโre willing to continue that friendship without working with them, but theyโre not going to hang around if a leader is not great.
Attracting top talent by telling our culture story [17:14]
Killian Vigna: Thatโs actually a really interesting point about the desire, the crave to have a relationship with your team, which your boss. Iโm going to park that one just for a second, or maybe Zoรฉ can ask that next because one thing you mentioned and I wanted to dig into it was about how do you know if a salon is the right fit for you?
When youโre crawling from salon to salon, looking to apply or hand your CV in, when I look at how we look for jobs, itโs easy to go to a corporate website. Youโve got the โAbout Usโ page, youโve got the LinkedIn. Itโs really easy to find out who the company is, the type of people who work there, the culture, and the values. Is that something, in your opinion, that salons offer or are they kind of lacking that to actually attract top talent at the moment?
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, I think itโs the number one opportunity in the beauty space right now, is to be better at telling our culture story. Knowing that thatโs the number one problem salon owners say they have is recruiting talent. Go to the independent suite world, that worldโฆ The big players are doing this phenomenal job of telling a story of exactly what they offer, and itโs tapping directly into the hearts and minds of the stylist. So, theyโre telling the narrative of you can work for yourself, own your own business, make the most money.
All the things that relate to the reasons they say they leave us, these large brands are like blasting out there that they can have. Itโs this tangible, I can achieve this and have this. Whereas you look at the beauty industry on the other side of it, and itโs significantly made up of small business owners, who have like one to five locations, donโt have really their head solidly around how to market to a future team member. Some of themโฆ Many of them are just getting their head around marketing to consumers with all of the different outlets we have to use.
What I encourage, based on the research Iโve done is that we have to be layering in that culture element. Like, who are we? What do we value? Whatโs the best thing about our team? If you were going to brag about your team, what would you say? That needs to be layered directly into your outbound marketing on every front that someone would look you up. The same way we think about making a marketing plan for how weโre going to tell the story to a consumer of why weโre their best salon to pick, we need to be telling that story to all the future employees.
If itโs just 10% of your marketing message, like every 10th Instagram posts, do something about your team. Great, start somewhere, because look at ourโฆ Like, our whole workforce is online. They go straight to your Instagram, they go straight to your website, they go straight to reviews, and they read about you. Give them what you want them to know, thatโs what I think about, because they get it everywhere else.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Itโs true, yeah.
Killian Vigna: Itโs true, absolutely. Yep.
What "being a friend" and a leader really means [20:00]
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: 100%. Iโll bring it back then to what Killian parked, the idea, yeah, for the friendship. Itโs interesting because you mentioned it at the very start with leadership, where people are wanting to have that nearly like friend to friend relationship. Still, for salon owners, I suppose many of them, it might feel really awkward to act as a friend towards their teams. What does that mean essentially to be like a friend to them? How do you shift into that?
Stefanie Fox: Yeah. I think we get awkward because we try so hard to be casual because we donโt necessarily know how to manage the emotion that comes with giving people feedback on how to do a better job because your natural instinct is to think like theyโre going to be offended, or theyโre going to think I donโt like them. Thereโs a ton of narratives, but ultimately โ
Killian Vigna: We crave to be liked.
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, on both sides, right? Like, we donโt want to make anybody mad. Friendship, I bucket that word, and when I did a deeper dive in the research, like, what do you mean by friends? Because a significant portion of them said, they want their leader to be their friend and give them feedback. Itโs really about relationship. If you go back to what I said about an oath, we take this oath to show people the gap. Thatโs where the feedback has to come in, but youโre never going to have any of that received well if you donโt have a preexisting relationship with somebody.
Because then they donโt think you care. Itโs likeโฆ If we think about anybody in our life that loves us, like our best friend, if your best friend came to you and they gave you a real hard truth, you would listen because you know they love you, and you know, as hard as that truth is to hear and whatever emotion it evokes, it is said with good intention. As leaders, we have to seek that level of relationship, where we do all the things we would do to build a great relationship with anyone else in a professional sphere, of course, so that we can follow through with our oath of helping them grow, and that they actually want to hear the feedback.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Yeah, so itโs not at all about knowing everything about your staffโs life, but more just about building that foundation of a strong relationship.
Stefanie Fox: Exactly. Itโs like, do they trust you? Do you trust them? Do they respect you? Do you respect them? Can you communicate with each other, both ways? Is there some level of connection? You actually enjoy that person? I always, for me the barometer like, if I had an employee that I just felt, I didnโt like, which was rare, but I can think of two occasions [crosstalk 00:22:35] existed. There was just something internal with me that just was like, Iโm not showing up as the best leader, and when I dug into that, if I genuinely disliked this person for some reason or another, I canโt lead them. Iโm not doing them any kind of service because I can not have a relationship with them, and that means they canโt be part of my team because that ruins my oath of like, my heart is I want to help people grow. I canโt help you grow if I donโt have that preexisting relationship with you. I think we have to work really hard on that. Itโs an essential element.
Killian Vigna: It sounds really harsh that they canโt be proud of your team. Had the person done anything to give you a reason for that? Was there any balance there? Because I feel like the colleague, Iโm going to assume they werenโt given it their all here, and you were just like, โNah, I think we got to go into this.โ
Stefanie Fox: Yeah (laughs). Ultimately, it comes back to that value alignment, which connects to culture, and this is that story tell. The better we get at telling our story, what we value, whatโs critically important in our business, why we do the things we do, all the things that would help people understand us, thatโs going to help us attract like-minded people. For me, the two times in my eight years of business that I had people that just Iโm like, this is not going to work, there was a value misalignment, and it felt like it was substantial enough that it was going to disrupt both my ability to serve them well and then their ability to grow in my business.
Out of my desire to serve them well, I canโt not help them grow, so we have to part ways, because this is not going to work.
Killian Vigna: Iโm glad itโs only ever happened twice in your life. Sounds a bit cutthroat.
Stefanie Fox: No (laughs)! Although my team would beโฆ I always, and I would tell any leader thatโs struggling here to do this. I teach people, straight up from the interview process, like we are a heavily feedback oriented team, and feedback goes all ways. You can give it to me, Iโm going to give it to you. Iโm going to ask people for feedback about you. You can ask for feedback about me. Itโs just this very open, transparent space. So, they kind of start hearing that narrative from the get-go, and then when weโre working together, itโs no shock when I walk into the break room and say to my team, โOkay, what do you think about the new person? Like, howโs it going?โ
Sometimes theyโre like, โWell, should we tell you? Because are you going to be having a really hard conversation with them?โ And they want to protect this person from the fact that I wouldโฆ I will always have the conversation. I do it professionally and lovingly, but nobody likes having a hard conversation when theyโre giving hard feedback. Theyโd like self-protect and also protect their team. Like, โWell, we donโt want to have you go talk to them about how theyโre not doing shop duties yet.โ Iโm like, โWell, then you better talk to them!โ
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Butโฆ thatโs what helps you grow!
Stefanie Fox: Exactly (laughs)!
Building a strong & healthy relationship with your salon team [25:19]
Killian Vigna: Stefanie, do you have any process in place then for putting yourself into the shoes of the BFF that theyโve never actually met before without actually being the BFF? How do you kind of fill that void that theyโre looking for, but still maintain a professional presence?
Stefanie Fox: For me, again, it goes back to that interview process. In my interview process, Iโm the fourth step, and that is, we have coffee. For me, I was fortunate that there was a coffee shop, just a few doors down from the business, but even if it meant meeting somebody offsite, I think just not being in the salon, sitting down and having coffee, I want to know you. I want to know whatโs going on in your life. Not necessarily so I can be your best friend, but so that I can know what you care about and what happens in your day-to-day. Then for me, I had Tuesday mornings, always in my calendar blocked off.
I would hang in the break room for two hours as people were coming in and out, and just like, โHey, how was your weekend? Whatโs going on in life?โ As a catch-up. It was intentional because otherwise, Iโd be all over the place. I mean, my schedule is so busy. It could be how, instead of the context of like, โHow was your weekend? Whatโs going on in your life?โ If you donโt want to be that casual, you could say, โHow was your Saturday at work? What happened?โ You can get specific, but it still is showing this interest. I want to know, I wasnโt here. Give me some update.
I think, if I was going to say about a process, itโs really just identify points that you can spend time with them in a way thatโs not just at a coaching session where youโre laying out numbers in front of them and saying, โOh, youโre pre-booking should be higher.โ
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Yeah. I think the way you ask questions as well, changes the whole relationship. I think back to this likeโฆ The first few months of me being in Ireland when people would ask like, โHey, how are you doing?โ I would actually reply, and in Ireland, itโs just like a formality just to kind of say hi, and they donโtโฆ Itโs just like you pass by and thatโs it. Right?
Killian Vigna: Iโm not stopping for a conversation, Iโm just asking, how are you? Iโve seen Zoรฉ in that awkward position so many times in the stairs.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Cringing thinking about it (laughs). But if you ask someone like, โHey, howโs your day?โ Theyโre probably just going to answer, โGood, howโs yours?โ Flip it back to you straight away, because thatโs what weโre used to hearing as a question. But if you goโฆ Iโve tested this out with loads of my friends and even people not so close to me, but like, โWhat was the best part of your day yesterday?โ Then youโre getting into something.
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, I love that. Yeah. I also think just being willing toโฆ You work with somebody every day, you observe their emotional patterns. If you see something that seems off, being willing to check in with them, whether they seem like theyโre in a great mood, maybe theyโre celebrating something, or somethingโs a little down, itโs okay as a leader, and I think itโs important as a leader to check in and say, โHey, how are you doing? It seems heavy with you this morning.โ They donโt have to give you any details, but just the idea that you noticed tugs on somebodyโs heart. So, itโs building those repetitive actions where they know they can come to you if something is going on, and they know that youโll celebrate them, and thatโs a big piece.
I think I learned this lesson, maybe the hard way in my life. I gave my team one year the love languages assessment because I wanted to know how they liked to feel loved. I think leadership is really about love. So many of them were words of appreciation, and I am terrible at that. In my brain, Iโm.terrible at it. Even my husband is like, โOh, I never get enough positive feedback.โ Iโm like, โOh my gosh!โ Because Iโm just not good at it. I have to train myself to be because I recognize that, as much as I have in my brain that I appreciate them and consciously think it, it needs to come out of my mouth.
I started putting calendar alerts for myself, like pop-ups that would remind me to give people positive affirmation, because they need it. Then I did the same thing. I created a gratitude practice in my business, where once a month I would do something completely ridiculous like, I bought donuts and like, โYou donuts how much I love you.โ Just these silly things thatโฆ I canโt even think of all the ridiculous. I used Pinterest to find ideas, but once a month, I would just give them all some sort of a fun gift that was like a thank you. You guys rock.
I think getting intentional like that also builds that relationship that says like, Iโm here for you, I care about you. Itโs not just a number. Youโre not just producing a profit in my business for me.
Navigating transparency levels as a salon leader [29:56]
Killian Vigna: As a leader operating the whole transparency approach like you want them to feel like everythingโs transparent, have you ever found yourself in a situation where youโre going, maybe theyโve asked a question about you, and youโve gone, โMaybe I shouldnโt give that level of detail?โ Is there ever a grey area when it comes back to you? Because conversations are two-way, relationships are two-way. But, maybe sometimes it might kind ofโฆ That friendship that they feel might get a bit too relaxed. Have you ever had to nip anything like that in the bud?
Stefanie Fox: Not for me, personally. I think Iโm pretty transparent, so I want them to know me, and I want them to know my life. Iโm pretty honest about like โToday is rough. Apologies in advance if I donโt show up as my best self, it is a hard day.โ I think where I see salon leaders get into the biggest mess with that is, if they spend a lot of time outside of work with their team with drinking involved. I definitely will have a cocktail here and there with my team, but itโs like, weโll go out, and Iโll have one or two drinks, and then Iโm like, โGreat guys! See you later!โ
Iโm not going to be the one thatโs out still awake at two oโclock, because I would rather be with my girlfriends if Iโm going to go out and stay until two oโclock, because you can tip over into maybe way more personal information. As a leader, you just have to have that sense of responsibility that you know like, hereโs kind of my line. Iโm not going to be as silly and transparent with my team about topics that I would totally be with my best girlfriends because it could definitely create a sticky situation later. It could diminish respect, and thatโs really, I think the line youโre walking is, be a friend, but not to the point that you diminish respect.
The power of connection: willpower & waypower [31:42]
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: I was going to bring it back to connection there because we mentioned it in this episode, you mentioned itโฆ It was actually a big part of your presentation at the Salon Owners Summit 2020. Anyone who remembers, you had like an anecdote about Italy and this part of Italy where people live a longer life expectancy. At Uplift! this year, you also talked about connection and said that it was composed of willpower and waypower. I would love for you to explain the nuance between the two, especially in a salon context.
Stefanie Fox: Yeah. For me, and again, this is all coming from asking stylists, like, โWhat do you want from us?โ Connection is the basis for emotional stability and safety. Again, if weโre going to be somebody helping somebody else grow, and we know that means thereโs going to be difficult conversations at times, we have to have emotional safety. Come back to the world today and all the things we went through in 2020, connection is what allows us to be hopeful. When you sense that youโre not alone, you can have a greater element of hope. Hope is comprised of willpower and waypower.
Willpower is this idea that, in your own mind, you have the will to get to an end goal or the will to achieve something, whereas waypower is you actually see a way to make it happen. You need both to get to an end game. You need to not only have the will but be forging an understanding of the way. I think that, as leaders, we are the will. We help create the willpower because if weโre leading and go back to that hand-in-hand idea, they know I trust this person, theyโve got my back. No matter how hard this feels, or how big I fail, Iโm not by myself. Then we have a sense โ
Killian Vigna: But not motivating.
Stefanie Fox: Not motivating, right? They also then have this sense that, as a leader, you should take responsibility for providing some of the waypower, because if people knew how to do all these things on their own, theyโd be out there doing them. If we have tools, education, resources, network, whatever it is, those are all waypower tools. We have to be responsible as a leader for putting them in front of somebody because then they can โ
Killian Vigna: Thatโs making sense now, yeah.
Stefanie Fox: Yeah. Weโve given them the like, hey, weโve got you. Weโre your cheerleader. Weโre going to be right here with you. By the way, hereโs maybe step one and how you get started.
Killian Vigna: Yeah. Would you call the need for education by providing educational resources, would that also be like waypower, or have you got a better example ofโฆ Sorry, waypower to me is just new. I kind of get willpower because Iโve always got terrible willpower when it comes to chocolate and drinks and stuff like that, but can you give me an example of waypower then?
Stefanie Fox: Yeah. Waypower would be, right now, performance in a business is critical. Salons need their team performing at their highest level, doing the best they can. The new performance report that Phorest just launched is a form of waypower. If Iโm a leader and I have built my business around this idea that Iโm going to help you grow and Iโm trying to live up to this, โIโm going to give you feedback, and Iโm going to care and be connected to you. By the way, hereโs one of the ways I can help you grow. Hereโs this tool Iโm going to put in your hands. Iโm going to teach you how to use it. Iโm going to ask you to look at your numbers every day.โ Thatโs a form of waypower that youโre giving them and saying like, hereโs information in your hands.
Killian Vigna: So they donโt have to keep going to you to find out how theyโre performing.
Stefanie Fox: Exactly.
Killian Vigna: Thatโs really good. I think we probably couldnโt have wrapped this episode up any better by literally giving them the tools in their hands and listen back to this episode, what? Every quarter, every couple of weeks when youโre doing your performance reviews or your one-to-ones. Willpower, waypower, put the tools in their hands. Thatโs excellent. Cheers. Alright, Zoรฉ, I think youโre ready to queue up now with your third thought-starter of the season.
Reflections, upcoming events & final words [35:38]
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Absolutely.
Killian Vigna: This is the bit that everyone gets either excited or nervous about. Which one are you, Stefanie?
Stefanie Fox: I donโt know. Iโm a little nervous.
Killian Vigna: Well, Iโm terrible at answering questions on the spot, so Iโm glad itโs you and not me.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: All right. Well, this actually ties really nicely into what you do with research. If you had to write a book, what would you write about?
Stefanie Fox: Oh goodness. I feel like I have like five book manuscripts on my computer right now. I always think about writing about โ
Killian Vigna: Whatโs your first one to publish?
Stefanie Fox: If I was going to write a book, I would write about the power of our tribes around us. For me, the people in my life allow me to do everything I do. They give me all the willpower. When I donโt have the willpower, itโs like, I go back to them, Iโm like, I need a dose. I would write about that. Iโd write about the people in my life.
Killian Vigna: I just need a quick hit!
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, exactly. Thatโs my dopamine hit. Itโs the people you know believe in you, and how crucial that is to get to whatever youโre dreaming up in life, whatever it is you want to do, however, you want to feel, itโs because of the people you surround yourself with.
Killian Vigna: That answer is just so everything youโve talked about in this episode.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Yeah!
Killian Vigna: Yeah, perfect.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Perfectly aligned!
Stefanie Fox: Iโm consistent (laughs)!
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Stefanie, if anyone wants to learn more about your research, or Talent Match, or anything else you do, where can people find you online?
Stefanie Fox: Yeah, so my website is talentmatch.biz, and thereโs actually a place in the top right-hand corner. They can request the visual of all the research. So, itโs in a really nice format. They can read through. Thereโs a lot of information, so get ready to digest some interesting things. Or you can also follow me on Instagram at @stef_fox_jaxn. Thatโs my leadership inspiration dose. Itโs my personal little dopamine hit that I do for myself every day. Hopefully, leaders get a little boost out of it.
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: I do personally, anyways. I follow you so I can attest to that!
Stefanie Fox: Yay (laughs)!
Killian Vigna: Excellent, Stef. Well, thank you so much for joining us on the show again, Stefanie. Itโs been a pleasure!
Stefanie Fox: Yeah. Thanks for having me!
Zoรฉ Bรฉlisle-Springer: Lots and lots of gems in this interview with Stefanie today. I hope that you bookmarked this episode.
In terms of whatโs coming up next, we have a brand new webinar coming up on March 1st with Steve Gomez. You can find all the information about this webinar in the transcript of this episode, and youโll also find a link to the Vish on-demand recorded webinar called Charging Your Worth, so you can catch that there.
One last thing before we sign off, donโt forget to head over to phorest.com/fm. You can also subscribe to the showโs email newsletter, and get all the updates, guestsโ downloadable content, resources, everything that we essentially talk about in these episodes delivered straight to your inbox weekly on Wednesdays.
As always, if you want to share your thoughts on Phorest FM, or this episode specifically, send us an email at phorestfm@phorest.com, or you can leave us a review on Apple Podcasts! We never shy away from feedback. Otherwise, stay safe, and weโll catch you next Monday.
Killian Vigna: All the best.
Related links
In 2021, with the emergence of a trend called โpresence-free living,โ we can expect to see consumers starting to put a premium on proximity, growth in innovative tools that make presence unnecessary and more than ever, brands needing to earn customersโ visits. A downward trend in frequency of visits is, in fact, already being observed across the salon industry.
In this session, Business Coach & Trainer Steve Gomez will support you in the following important areas of salon business: perception & thinking, sales growth & customer service, new client retention, cash flow management, and team involvement. Strengthen your approach to these areas, and you strengthen your business plan & improve results!
Save your spot on โMission Control: Learn To Shift When Needed & Improve Results,โ taking place on Monday, March 1st 2021 at 1:00 pm US Eastern Time.
More specifically:
- Learn how your perception dictates results and how you can shift where needed
- Discover new client integration & retention strategies
- Grow your add-on business to bridge client traffic gaps
And, watch โCharging Your Worth: An In-Depth Look At Pricing & Communicating Value,โ now available on-demand!
More specifically:
- Learn how to break down your color business and understand pricing
- Get ways to review and present options for communicating prices to clients
- Understand how to take control of dispensed color and turn it into a profit center while also focusing on sustainable practices in your business
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